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Finding something important and meaningful in your life is the most productive use of your time and energy.
This is true because every life has problems associated with it, and finding meaning in your life will help you maintain the effort required to overcome the particular problems you face.
Therefore, we can say that the key to living a decent life is not in taking care of more things, but only in the things that align with your personal values.
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My notes are informal and often contain quotes from the book as well as my own thoughts. This summary also includes key lessons and important passages from the book.
Traditional self - help advice that tells you to imagine success and think about the kind of person you want to be only reinforces the idea that you are not that thing.
Everyone wants you to believe that the secret to a good life is getting a better job, or a better car, or a better girlfriend.
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The key to a good life is not to worry about more; She cares less and only cares about what is real, immediate and important.
We are no longer facing a financial crisis. We have many resources: televisions, clothes, goods that we do not need. The problem we face is existential and spiritual. We have so many things and so many opportunities that we no longer know what to worry about.
Since there are an infinite number of things that we can now see or know about, there are also an infinite number of ways in which we can discover that we are not measuring, that we are not good enough, and that things are not as good as they seem. can be.
The desire for a more positive experience is itself a negative experience. Ironically, accepting a negative experience is itself a positive experience. Chasing something just reinforces that you were missing it in the first place.
subtle art of not giving a f book
Accepting your experience in life as wonderful and wonderful is the greatest thing you can do for your happiness. "You will never be happy if you keep searching for what happiness is.
You will never live if you search for the meaning of life." Albert Camus Everything worthwhile in life is gained by overcoming the negative experience associated with it.
If you can stop worrying about the pain your goals require, you can't stop it. The moments when we don't care and take action are often the most defining moments of our life course.
You will die one day. Everyone you know will die soon. And in your short life you only have a certain amount of absurdity. Learning to effectively focus and prioritize your thoughts based on precise personal values is perhaps the biggest and most important struggle in life.
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1: Indifference does not mean indifference. It simply means that you are comfortable being different. Don't say damn everything in life, just the unimportant things.
2: In order not to worry about adversity, you must first worry about something more important than adversity.
3: Whether you realize it or not, you always choose what should matter to you. The key is to gradually cut back on the things that matter to you, so that you only care about the most important occasions.
the art of not giving a f book
When a person doesn't have problems, the mind automatically finds a way to invent some.
I believe that what most people, especially educated and spoiled middle-class whites, consider "life's problems" are really just side effects of not having anything more important to worry about. on. Finding something important and meaningful in your life is the most productive use of your time and energy.
It's okay for things to take up some time. Practical enlightenment is the act of becoming comfortable with the idea that some suffering is always inevitable.
Suffering is meaningless when done without purpose. Don't expect a life without problems. Hope in a life with good problems.
The problems never stop. They're just getting a trade or a promotion. Happiness is found in solving problems, not avoiding them.
True happiness only happens when you find problems that you enjoy solving and that you enjoy solving. Happiness is the desire for the problems you have and the desire to solve them.
the subtle art of not giving a fuck
Emotions are simply biological signals designed to push you in the direction of beneficial change. Negative emotions are a sign that something is not being addressed. It is a call to action. Positive emotions are the reward for taking the right action.
We must question our emotions because they are not always correct. Don't ask yourself what you want from life. It's easy to want success, fame, happiness, and great sex. Everybody wants these things.
The most interesting question to ask yourself is, "What kind of pain do I want?" What you are willing to fight for is a major determinant of how our lives will turn out.
You can't just love the result. Everyone loves the result. You have to love the process Getting to the top is an endless upward spiral with new problems always arising and new processes to fall in love with. You are never allowed to stop climbing because the goal is to love climbing.
If you stop loving climbing, the results will never come, self-esteem, in itself, is overrated. Feeling good about yourself doesn't help unless you have a good reason to feel that way. The struggle makes self-esteem useful, not the cup of sharing.
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Their problems are no different in severity or pain. You are not alone in your suffering. The more we are exposed to opposing points of view, the more we are disturbed by the presence of other points of view.
This seems like a logical trend to me because before the internet and our modern highly interconnected world, people didn't have a high probability of falling in love with ideas that didn't agree with their own.
Today, alternative ideas are more likely to cross your radar screen. Most of us are pretty average at most things we do. Even if you're exceptional at something, chances are you're average or below average at most other things.
Our lives today are filled with information from the extremes of the bell curve of human experience.
The best of the best, the worst and the most annoying. We only see the most extraordinary news because that's what generates revenue. This is a real problem when it comes to comparison because you can only be exceptional at one thing and below average at just about everything else.
This makes comparison a very dangerous game. The problem is that the ubiquity of technology and mass marketing erode many people's expectations of themselves.
One of the most pervasive narratives about masculinity in our culture is that sex is the most valuable thing a man can achieve, and it's worth sacrificing almost anything to get it. it's. (Interestingly, this aligns with one of the dominant narratives among women, that the most beautiful thing a woman can be is beauty.)
Exceptional people become like this by thinking they are average and focusing on getting better. Do not become exceptional by thinking that you are exceptional.
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The more uncomfortable the answer, the more likely it is correct. Problems are inevitable, but what they mean is resilience. We control what our problems mean to us based on how we choose to think about them and how we choose to measure them.
How we measure success affects how we view the problems we face. "Pleasure is a false god.
Research shows that people who focus their energy on superficial pleasures end up with more anxiety, emotional instability, and depression. Pleasure is the most superficial form of life satisfaction, and therefore the easiest to obtain and the easiest to achieve. lose."
People who base their self-esteem on being right about everything prevent them from learning from their mistakes. "One day later, years of fighting will make you the most beautiful."
Sigmund Freud People who are afraid of what others think of them are actually terrified of all the negative things they think reflect back on them.
When we feel like we are choosing our problems, we feel empowered. When we feel that our problems are imposed on us against our will, we feel victimized and miserable.
We are not always in control of what happens to us. But we are always in control of how we interpret what happens to us, as well as how we respond. Accepting responsibility for our problems is the first step to solving them.
Many people are reluctant to take responsibility for their problems because they think that taking responsibility for their problems is also wrong. This is not true. We are responsible for experiences that are not our fault all the time. This is part of life.
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People often fight over who will be responsible for their success and happiness. But taking responsibility for our problems is much more important because that's where the real learning comes in.
Growth is an endless iterative process. When we learn something new, we don't go from "wrong" to "right." Instead, we go from bug to slightly smaller bug. We should not strive to find the ultimate "right" answer for ourselves, but rather, we should strive to eliminate the ways we are wrong today so that we can be less wrong tomorrow.
Certainty is the enemy of growth. All beliefs are wrong, some are less wrong than others. Baumeister's unexpected insight into evil: Some of the worst criminals often feel good about themselves. Low self-esteem has not always been related to bad actions.
The more you try to make sure of a particular problem, the more insecure and distrustful you feel. The more you accept uncertainty and lack of knowledge, the more comfortable you will feel knowing what you don't know.
The man who thinks he knows everything learns nothing. Manson's Law of Avoidance: The more something threatens his identity, the more he will avoid it. The more something threatens your view of yourself, the more you avoid turning around to do it.
If I thought I was a good guy, I would avoid situations that might conflict with that belief. If I thought I was a great cook, I would look for opportunities to prove myself over and over again. Belief always takes precedence. Manson's idea of "killing yourself" is similar to Paul Graham's idea of "keeping your identity small."
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The point is that if you don't have an identity to protect, change becomes much easier. For any change to happen in your life, you have to accept that you were wrong about something you were doing before.
"It is a mark of an educated mind to be able to consider an idea without accepting it." Aristotle If you feel you are against the world, you are probably alone against yourself.
The scale of your success is related to the number of times you failed at that thing. Goals are limited in the amount of happiness they can provide in our lives because they are limited.
Once the goal was achieved, it could no longer provide happiness because the finish line had been crossed. Ironically, then, by choosing processes as your point of focus, you can increase your overall lifetime happiness by focusing on the process, not the goal.
The processes are endless, which means that happiness can continue indefinitely. Work is not just the effect of a motive; It is also the reason for that. Do something and that inspiration follows. How do you write so many books? Write "200 bad words a day" and you will often find that the motivation comes from you.
Manson's principle of doing something is very similar to the philosophy behind the two-minute rule. Do something now, even if it's very small, and let good things happen as a result.
To truly appreciate something, you must limit yourself to it. There is a certain level of joy and meaning that you only achieve in life when you spend decades investing in a relationship, a movement, a career.
And you can't achieve those decades of investment without rejecting the alternatives. The sign of an unhealthy relationship is when two people try to solve each other's problems in order to feel good about themselves.
Trust is the most important component of any relationship for the simple reason that without trust, the relationship really means nothing.
Investing deeply in a person, a place, a job, or an activity can deprive us of the breadth of experience we desire, but seeking a wide range of experiences deprives us of the opportunity to enjoy the rewards of depth of experience.
in its own way, it provides a wealth of opportunities and experiences that will never be available to you, no matter how many surface-level experiences you seek.
the subtle art of not giving a f book pdf
The rejection of alternatives frees us. In a weird way, sticking to one thing offers more freedom than anything else because it frees you from every second assumption about what's out there.
If there is no reason to do anything, and if life is useless, then there is no reason to do nothing. What do you have to lose? You're going to die anyway, so your fears, embarrassments, and failures mean nothing.
You might as well try it. All meaning in our lives is shaped by our innate desire to never really die. Our physical bodies will die, but we cling to the idea that we can live through religion, politics, sports, art, and technological innovation.
The only way to be comfortable with death is to understand and see yourself as something greater than yourself, to contribute to a much larger entity.
Choosing your values and living according to them is what makes you great, not just any result or achievement. "We will all die, all of us. What a circus! This should only make us love each other, but it doesn't." - Charles Bukowski Reading Suggestions.
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This is a list of authors, books, and concepts mentioned in The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, which may be useful for future reading.
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